My life was going pretty well with typical teenage things until I decided to go to Bangalore for my higher studies. I went there, and the first months were fine. Then I met him. He was my friend’s friend. At first, we just talked, and eventually, we fell in love. At that time, he was about to break up with his girlfriend (as he said). We continued our relationship to the next level. We had many moments together, and finally, I completed my course and planned to return to Bangalore for a job. I returned home, and he stayed in Bangalore. Later, he told me that his friend was coming to Bangalore for a job-related thing and needed a place to stay, and it would be better for her to stay with him. I was not okay with it at first, but he convinced me (she was his best friend). I finally agreed, and she arrived in Bangalore. The next day was my birthday. They both wished me, and I was happy. She left Bangalore that day for work. On that day, he was acting strange, and I asked him what happened. He said it was nothing and that he was okay. The next morning, he told me he was a bad guy and I was a nice girl and other things like that. I was confused and didn’t understand what he was trying to say. Then he said he and his best friend had s*x the previous night, on my birthday. I was shocked and heartbroken. Later, he said he was joking or making up a story to tease me. The worst thing was that I trusted him blindly.

After some months, he forced me to go back to Bangalore and stay with him, but I was not ready. He threatened to call my parents and tell them about our relationship, including that we had s*x and show them pictures as evidence. I had no other option and decided to go to him, leaving my parents, which I regret deeply. He came to pick me up in my hometown, and I went with him. After my parents found out, they complained to the police, who reached out to us and asked us to come to the police station. While we were on the train, he accused me of being with other guys and acted crazy. I was scared, and he warned me about the pictures and asked me to tell the police that I would go back with him and not with my parents. I was forced to say that, but my parents brought me back home, saying they were ready for marriage with him, which I was not interested in but was forced to agree to.

While I was home, my parents and friends investigated his past and found out that he was a drug addict and had other serious issues. I had no other option but to stay with him because of his threats. Finally, I found out that the incident with his best friend was true, and so were the things my parents discovered. My parents and friends supported me, telling me not to worry about his threats. I decided to leave him and was ready to face anything that might happen. My parents finally called him and told him I was no longer in the relationship. When he heard this, he behaved like a psycho, and his mom started threatening my parents. But I stood by my parents’ side, and we fought against him and his family. I was depressed for months and still haven’t fully recovered. My father and brother still don’t fully trust me and are not recovered from the trauma, just like me. They still fear I might go back to him. But my mom has been the only one who has supported me all along. I regret choosing him over my family. The pain I’m living with now is indescribable. I’m still trying to recover with the support of my loved ones. He threatened me for months (without my parents knowing), but my friends and I fought back. Now he’s not showing up, and if he does, I’m determined not to give up and to face him. My friends and family are the best things that have happened to me. I’m now focused on building my career and promised my parents and myself that I won’t fall into another relationship or go against their wishes again. I’m still not in touch with my brother, and that hurts me. I hope he will forgive me one day.

I can’t smile openly. I smile during the day to show my family that I’m okay, but at night, I’m haunted by the worst memories and the things I did to my parents and friends. There is so much more that happened that I can’t write it all down. I regret my past and am ready to do anything to make my family happy. But something is holding me back from being my old self. I’m trying my best. Recently, another guy expressed his love for me, but I’m still scared of relationships. I told him that I’m not interested in a relationship or going against my parents’ wishes. He’s still not ready to give up on me and says he loves me for who I am, not my past. But I won’t fall for him because I’m still scared of relationships. I tried to make him understand, and he accepted my request reluctantly. He said that if I ever change my mind, I should go back to him. Do you think it’s okay for me to let him propose to my family about his interest in me? Is that the right thing to do, or should I let him give up on me? I’m still traumatized and don’t know what to say. I can’t trust anyone easily. That’s how I am traumatized.